70000 Tons of Metal 2024 Review Recap Part 2

DAY 02 – SOMEWHERE IN THE FUCKIN’ OCEAN

By:Tom Mis

January 30th, 2024

Up until now, I’ve neglected to mention that the boat has a destination – in this case, Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic – but the destination hardly matters. After I booked my cabin, I promptly forgot where the boat was going to actually sail to (as boats tend to do). When I told people I’d be going on a cruise in January, the first thing they asked was “where to?” and I simply shrugged my shoulders and responded “I dunno.” This, naturally, confused absolutely everyone. It’s all about the journey, not the destination.

After sleeping in a bit after the 3am Dalriada set, I woke up around 11 to hear folks buzzing that Nanowar of Steel, during their 10am Pool Deck set, built an IKEA table on stage mid-song and chucked it into the crowd – a cheeky reference to one of their songs where Odin becomes a carpenter, “just like Jesus.” This was all anyone wanted to discuss, despite how completely reckless it was. As far as I could tell, nobody was hurt in the process.

I finally felt human enough around 12:15 to catch Tygers of Pan Tang in the Theater, one of the more classic heavy metal bands on the boat this year. All of my respect goes to the guitar players in that band who aren’t John Sykes but have to keep up with his material. We cut out a hair early to rush to our first pool deck set of the day, Scar Symmetry – and honestly, half of the fun of it is being out in the ocean watching a band in broad daylight with a giant smoke stack emitting from the engine chugging along.

After stopping to eat a proper meal of three hamburgers topped with mac & cheese, we headed back indoors to the Ice Rink for back to back sets from I Am the Night and Nervosa. 

I Am the Night is one of the best new black metal bands in the scene, with all the filth and disgust you want from old school black metal, with none of the sloppy playing. This was a precise set – dark, moody, and absolutely vicious. It was at this point that I was approached by a random girl in the venue, who asked me if I had a Sharpie, presumably because I had a bag on me. She said she needed to fix a shirt – and though I didn’t have a Sharpie, nothing seemed obviously wrong with her shirt. It was then that she pointed out to me that security misprinted all of their shirts, having missed a zero in “70000” and she planned on (drunkenly) fixing all of them by hand.

(Day 04 update – I did ask a few members of security if they would be willing to part with their misprinted shirts, so I could have a fun momento. They all declined, and insisted the shirts were special and they’d either keep them for themselves if the company didn’t mandate that they return them).

The only thing that could’ve possibly followed and maintained that pacing and energy in the room was Nervosa. This was my first time seeing them with the new expanded lineup – splitting guitar duties with Prika Amaral is Helena Kotina, who shreds like Maiden’s Adrian Smith, Hel Pyre continuing to hold down the low end in place of Mia Wallace, and the introduction of brand new drummer Gabriella Abud, who was an absolute beast behind the kit. Prika proved herself to be more than a capable vocalist, and she wasn’t too proud to sing old hits like “Masked Betrayer” alongside modern classics like “Endless Ambition.” This set marked Gabriella’s first official show with the band, but she fit in like she’s been there all along.

At this point, the sun was setting and we decided to spend the rest of the evening on the Pool Deck stage from about 6pm to around 2am. Kicking off the streak was classic Swedish death metal legends Unleashed, followed by My Dying Bride. Though MDB hit some technical snags that delayed and shortened their set, they always deliver live. This was a particularly heavy and brooding setlist, with Aaron reaching for his death vocals in all but one track (“The Cry of Mankind”), despite having records full of nothing but clean singing. A light mist just so happened to cover the boat during their set – appropriate for MDB – and really set the mood.

The mist lifted just in time for Epica to hit the stage, who played a special tribute set to 2014’s The Quantum Enigma, alongside a few classics. Twenty-two years has not slowed them down one bit, and the hot tubs surrounding the stage even attempted a wall of death at Simone’s request. After their set, the pool deck seemed to empty out – I don’t imagine the overlap between Epica and Sodom being huge, but other than those unwilling to give up their spot in the hot tubs with a view of the stage, the crowd seemed to turn over completely.

Sometime in between Epica and Sodom, I stood on the top deck of the boat, overlooking the vast darkness and nothingness of the ocean. A couple of people nearby were also admiring the beauty of the pitch black darkness surrounding the boat, and one asked “Where are we?” – to which another simply responded, “I don’t see shit or fuck, so I guess we’re somewhere in the fuckin’ ocean.” Absolute poetry.

Sodom took the stage at around 12:30am, and proceeded to rip everyone’s face off with a special old-school set. As a Sodom fan, this was incredibly wild to hear a set that mostly focused on and around Obsessed by Cruelty and Persecution Mania – there were no newer cuts included. They were saving all that for a special Agent Orange set later on day four. This was by far the most aggressive set on board from the audience. Most pits, hot tub pits, crowd surfers, and general chaos made this especially memorable.

This piece is a 4 part piece. Check back for Part 3 Coming soon!!